Last night a good friend, Steven, texted me and asked me to jot down some notes about my run at Jemez so next year when I run this course I can be better prepared. I got me a binder and plan to do that this evening. After waking up late today and feeling like a train had ran over me I went on my daily routine of seeing new customers and trying to get my job done. All morning I thought about my run and what mental notes I need to write to make the next run up this mountain at 50 miles instead of 50km be easier with a better time irregardless of weather. This kind of got me to thinking. Yea I do way too much of that...... Why not do it now over every run I've done this year as well as a couple of my training haunts I love??? I haven't looked at my running schedule to see if my target races will coincide with the races I've ran this year but it can't hurt to write down little things that can make each run a tad more manageable the next time I do it. Makes perfect sense!!! Easy Peasy!! Well til I got to thinking some more..... Why shouldn't I do this with life or relationships? Nobody wants to live in the past but maybe if I write down things I've done right and things I'm so great at totally butchering it could be possible to avoid major pitfalls that I seem to find. Dang that's gonna be alotta writing. I'm not much into watching TV anymore and the daily routine of stopping for a 12 pack and drinking it nightly is finally gone so why not? I did take a break from not buying beer in bulk the night I ran Jemez. I got me a 18pack and had a few Sat night and Sunday. Monday AM it was back into training mode. I don't miss it and frankly buying that box of beer kinda scared me. I don't wanna go back to "that guy " again. A mixed drink when my legs are hurting or over a meal suffices me just fine. Actually I may integrate buying a box of beer after every milestone I hit. Just a gentle reminder to myself as to who I was before and the person I'm striving to become. I woke up this AM at 3 and read a old blog John Sharp had written in 09. I read it about 10 times because I saw so many similarities to myself in it. The more I get involved in Ultrarunning I see this more and more. I think we are kind of a motley group of people on a journey to find either ourself or a greater purpose in life. I love the runs where I'm broke down physically AND mentally. After recovering hopefully each time will make me stronger. Don't get me wrong, I have very successful and "normal" peers I run with who, like myself are very driven in life. You have to be driven to put yourself through these runs.
Anyway- back to writing..... I haven't quite figured out how this may help me as I start new chapters career wise but I'll see. I need to get my running and personal life documented first. This phase of my life is pretty much uncharted waters for me. I've never been on a journey to rebuild a life I destroyed where I was sober. It's kinda cool but it's not something I've ever done before. People who have never experienced it will critique me and tell me to just do this, this and this. That's all well and good if you aren't seeking a greater purpose in life other than a mere existence. Go Big or Go Home is going to be my mantra with my running. As a person I only wish to be humble and grateful for the life I have.... Til next time Run Strong!
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Jemez 50km
This was the race I signed up for and had been focusing my training on. I signed up for the 50km but this included 10,000 ft of gain in elevation during the 31 miles. Translation- closer to running 50 miles on flatter ground like Texas. Myself and 3 buddies carpooled to Santa Fe,NM Thursday sharing driving and napping and of course talking smack. The rest of our group flew out Thursday and Friday am and we finally all got settled in our rented condo Friday. Yes we team up for support but to also try and cut travel expenses as well. Friends with you only enhance the experience. Friday after settling in we drove up to Los Alamos to check into the race. The views were just stunning up there minus the showers. It rained Thursday night as well and the race director sent out emails advising everyone to bring "shells" with them. I was thinking pasta or bullets for a gun???? Heck I'm from Plano,Tx. It rains at home n we scramble to the car. We finally decided since we didn't have guns on us, it had to be rain jackets.
Saturday was race day and after a shower n food we got to the course at 4:45am. The 50 milers started at 5am n 50km at 6am. I had all my gear as well as a new drink supplement I wanted to try. Mile 10 to 18 I heard was just brutal without a aid station and all uphill so I geared my nutrition towards completing that without totally emptying the energy tank. I tried U-Can(protein enhanced) last week on a 10mile road run with a friend and my energy during and after was pretty level. All the sugar based supplements seem to put me on a roller coaster energy wise and I didn't wanna hit bottom because of that. At the start of the race I as usual found the back of the pack to avoid getting sucked into a foot race early on. As well as this, I search for my friends and that sort of helps me judge where I need to be. New course, elevation,and although it was going to be a sunny start I was concerned about rain. The 1st 10 miles is fairly easy winding around leading you to the base of Pajarito Mountain and Ski area. It was a pretty normal run other than not being able to breathe. The altitude at the start was 7k feet and it's difficult to run hard. I as usual bounced around running with several people and trying to save energy. We rolled into the 10 mile aid and I took a little break to hydrate and pack nutrition in me for the impeding climb. We knew the next aid was mile 18 at the ski lodge and I wanted to make sure this run/walk was going to be as easy as possible. My lil buddy Billy had been near me all day and he was ahead of me a bit going into this section. I had left another friend (Ritu) at the start but knew she'd catch me soon enough. These 8 miles were dang hard with alotta breaks to breathe but uneventful other than the gorgeous views. Like clockwork Ritu caught me n Billy and we all stuck near each other all the way to the Lodge at 18. After 18 we had aid at 21,24,30 n finished at 32.8. When we got to the lodge the light rain hit and then sleet. We hauled butt outta there trying to get to 21. We THOUGHT we had been told it was primarily downhill after 18 so we got going and we were wrong on the downhill starting there. 1/2 way to 21 the snow hit. Not like Texas snow where it is just a dusting. Years ago I was in upstate New York n had lake effect snow. This was very similar. Huge flakes, high wind with booming thunder n lightening. The 3 of us were all wearing tight pants, sleeves and had rain ponchos. We got to 21 n I was shivering terribly. Billy n Ritu hooked it outta the aid station n when my teeth started chattering I had to go before I got pulled from the race. We had to get to mile 24 but unknown to us, the highest point on the course was between us n the next aid. We were the only ones out there other than a local runner that passed us. We spread out but stayed within eyesight. I was cold but finally got the true meaning of the term "Embrace The Suck" When you get to a point where there is absolutely zero you can do to change your current situation, not fighting it with negative thoughts will in the end defeat what is wrong. I'm sure it sounds crazy but I let go of my fear n my cold and moved forward as hard as I could. I guess at close to mile 23 the snow stopped and I ripped my poncho off n trashed it at the aid station. I wanted water n Oreos and get on down the mountain. We had 8 miles of downhill switchbacks and I loved every one of them. The sun came out and the clouds blew out. The views were great and I knew Billy n Ritu could finish so I just went as fast as I could those 8 miles. Aid at mile 30 consisted of Bacon n Beer. Not a good combo I found out shortly after leaving there. They had a tequila option but I was out on that. The last 2 miles were like the previous 6. Ran as hard as I could when the course allowed it. Soon after crossing the line I found out they closed the course n cancelled the race just minutes after I left mile 21. Many runners, as well as myself were unprepared for a blizzard in May. Critiquing myself I'm pretty happy. I trained hard and I will get stronger but hey- 4 months of serious running it was a solid effort. My fueling was spot on and my pace was ok. 100% improvement over my last 2 runs. I have a mentor I've ran with a coupla times and talk to some and I really think our conversations have given me more confidence in myself. This running deal is so much like life it's scary. Whether it's confidence, the journey, etc. I'm very blessed to be surrounded with great people and without them I wouldn't be where I am today. A friend of mine- Dave Hanneburg told me just this morning, ignorance is bliss. That is such a true statement with my running. I think I'm so new to this I'm gullible enough to try new things and can't wait to reset goals for my next big adventure!
Saturday was race day and after a shower n food we got to the course at 4:45am. The 50 milers started at 5am n 50km at 6am. I had all my gear as well as a new drink supplement I wanted to try. Mile 10 to 18 I heard was just brutal without a aid station and all uphill so I geared my nutrition towards completing that without totally emptying the energy tank. I tried U-Can(protein enhanced) last week on a 10mile road run with a friend and my energy during and after was pretty level. All the sugar based supplements seem to put me on a roller coaster energy wise and I didn't wanna hit bottom because of that. At the start of the race I as usual found the back of the pack to avoid getting sucked into a foot race early on. As well as this, I search for my friends and that sort of helps me judge where I need to be. New course, elevation,and although it was going to be a sunny start I was concerned about rain. The 1st 10 miles is fairly easy winding around leading you to the base of Pajarito Mountain and Ski area. It was a pretty normal run other than not being able to breathe. The altitude at the start was 7k feet and it's difficult to run hard. I as usual bounced around running with several people and trying to save energy. We rolled into the 10 mile aid and I took a little break to hydrate and pack nutrition in me for the impeding climb. We knew the next aid was mile 18 at the ski lodge and I wanted to make sure this run/walk was going to be as easy as possible. My lil buddy Billy had been near me all day and he was ahead of me a bit going into this section. I had left another friend (Ritu) at the start but knew she'd catch me soon enough. These 8 miles were dang hard with alotta breaks to breathe but uneventful other than the gorgeous views. Like clockwork Ritu caught me n Billy and we all stuck near each other all the way to the Lodge at 18. After 18 we had aid at 21,24,30 n finished at 32.8. When we got to the lodge the light rain hit and then sleet. We hauled butt outta there trying to get to 21. We THOUGHT we had been told it was primarily downhill after 18 so we got going and we were wrong on the downhill starting there. 1/2 way to 21 the snow hit. Not like Texas snow where it is just a dusting. Years ago I was in upstate New York n had lake effect snow. This was very similar. Huge flakes, high wind with booming thunder n lightening. The 3 of us were all wearing tight pants, sleeves and had rain ponchos. We got to 21 n I was shivering terribly. Billy n Ritu hooked it outta the aid station n when my teeth started chattering I had to go before I got pulled from the race. We had to get to mile 24 but unknown to us, the highest point on the course was between us n the next aid. We were the only ones out there other than a local runner that passed us. We spread out but stayed within eyesight. I was cold but finally got the true meaning of the term "Embrace The Suck" When you get to a point where there is absolutely zero you can do to change your current situation, not fighting it with negative thoughts will in the end defeat what is wrong. I'm sure it sounds crazy but I let go of my fear n my cold and moved forward as hard as I could. I guess at close to mile 23 the snow stopped and I ripped my poncho off n trashed it at the aid station. I wanted water n Oreos and get on down the mountain. We had 8 miles of downhill switchbacks and I loved every one of them. The sun came out and the clouds blew out. The views were great and I knew Billy n Ritu could finish so I just went as fast as I could those 8 miles. Aid at mile 30 consisted of Bacon n Beer. Not a good combo I found out shortly after leaving there. They had a tequila option but I was out on that. The last 2 miles were like the previous 6. Ran as hard as I could when the course allowed it. Soon after crossing the line I found out they closed the course n cancelled the race just minutes after I left mile 21. Many runners, as well as myself were unprepared for a blizzard in May. Critiquing myself I'm pretty happy. I trained hard and I will get stronger but hey- 4 months of serious running it was a solid effort. My fueling was spot on and my pace was ok. 100% improvement over my last 2 runs. I have a mentor I've ran with a coupla times and talk to some and I really think our conversations have given me more confidence in myself. This running deal is so much like life it's scary. Whether it's confidence, the journey, etc. I'm very blessed to be surrounded with great people and without them I wouldn't be where I am today. A friend of mine- Dave Hanneburg told me just this morning, ignorance is bliss. That is such a true statement with my running. I think I'm so new to this I'm gullible enough to try new things and can't wait to reset goals for my next big adventure!
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Recovery
What the heck does this mean?
How is it done?
What does it achieve?
Does everyone do it?
How long does it take?
I don't have a clue but I think I'm starting to figure out what works for me. All weekend and this week I've been second guessing my decision to run as far as in a short span of time relatively speaking. I tanked, my time was terrible and I slept like 16hrs the following day. I've ran that distance and longer in a shorter span of time. Why did I feel this way?
The same is true for life and relationships gone awry. Everyone falls in love and many fall out or things happen and it's just gone. What do we do next?
The same can be said for substance abuse. Why do we crave the drink? When we FINALLY reach the point we don't want it running our lives what do we do next? I'm sure the same can be said about many other problems that ail society. Just fixing the problem is never enough until you go through the recovery stage.
Tonight's run was my 1st since bonking so bad Sat and was a turning point in my attitude. It was recovery for my legs just to check and make sure I wasn't injured but more importantly it was allowing my mind to know that I can lay down some decent times over rough terrain and feel great afterwards. As well as this, I got to escape reality and focus on why things went so bad for me Saturday. As I arrived at my trail I - as usual- got my Emergen-C and put it in a bottle of water and downed it. I then got another packet n dumped it in my water I was going to run with. A friend and mentor, I'll call him Jason,suggested using this and I go through a ton of it. Well my mind started working. I train using this but never took any with me to a race??? WTH? If it works n keeps my body balanced why not have it when it run a race? Maybe I'm a idiot??? LOL After that enlightenment to myself I cruised and my running game will be A-OK barring injury.
On the drive home tonight I got to thinking about this. After all my screw ups over a lost love I realized that everyone has the missing link usually right there in their hand. Do the things that got you to the good times and stick with it and you will survive the rough storms life throws at you. Change it up and you will always BONK!
As far as recovery time? How it's done? It's a journey in life. Running parallels so much of life and I'm sure that's why I do it. The sound of my feet hitting the ground and hearing my heart in my chest gives me peace and no matter what life throws at me I can probably handle it with a few miles alone doing some thinking.
I guess the point of this is that no matter what happens in life,with a huge heart and desire to do better anyone can get past problems. There are other marathons and ultras that I'm going to do and do better at. There will someday be another love that hopefully I can be the best at, and I'm finally realizing sobriety is a pretty cool deal. That's all I got to say about that! :)
How is it done?
What does it achieve?
Does everyone do it?
How long does it take?
I don't have a clue but I think I'm starting to figure out what works for me. All weekend and this week I've been second guessing my decision to run as far as in a short span of time relatively speaking. I tanked, my time was terrible and I slept like 16hrs the following day. I've ran that distance and longer in a shorter span of time. Why did I feel this way?
The same is true for life and relationships gone awry. Everyone falls in love and many fall out or things happen and it's just gone. What do we do next?
The same can be said for substance abuse. Why do we crave the drink? When we FINALLY reach the point we don't want it running our lives what do we do next? I'm sure the same can be said about many other problems that ail society. Just fixing the problem is never enough until you go through the recovery stage.
Tonight's run was my 1st since bonking so bad Sat and was a turning point in my attitude. It was recovery for my legs just to check and make sure I wasn't injured but more importantly it was allowing my mind to know that I can lay down some decent times over rough terrain and feel great afterwards. As well as this, I got to escape reality and focus on why things went so bad for me Saturday. As I arrived at my trail I - as usual- got my Emergen-C and put it in a bottle of water and downed it. I then got another packet n dumped it in my water I was going to run with. A friend and mentor, I'll call him Jason,suggested using this and I go through a ton of it. Well my mind started working. I train using this but never took any with me to a race??? WTH? If it works n keeps my body balanced why not have it when it run a race? Maybe I'm a idiot??? LOL After that enlightenment to myself I cruised and my running game will be A-OK barring injury.
On the drive home tonight I got to thinking about this. After all my screw ups over a lost love I realized that everyone has the missing link usually right there in their hand. Do the things that got you to the good times and stick with it and you will survive the rough storms life throws at you. Change it up and you will always BONK!
As far as recovery time? How it's done? It's a journey in life. Running parallels so much of life and I'm sure that's why I do it. The sound of my feet hitting the ground and hearing my heart in my chest gives me peace and no matter what life throws at me I can probably handle it with a few miles alone doing some thinking.
I guess the point of this is that no matter what happens in life,with a huge heart and desire to do better anyone can get past problems. There are other marathons and ultras that I'm going to do and do better at. There will someday be another love that hopefully I can be the best at, and I'm finally realizing sobriety is a pretty cool deal. That's all I got to say about that! :)
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Box of Rox
This weekend was really different for me. All week I struggled with some personal and professional issues and it seemed like the more I searched for answers the more complex things got. All that aside I wound up in Burnet,Tx Friday afternoon. A sleepy lil place where people get married and prolly never leave but I'm sure great for raising families. Hotel check-in, dinner and then some quality time with great friends! Walking back to my hotel room I looked up at the sky and that was the most beautiful thing I saw all weekend. I love living in Plano but the smaller communities really get to enjoy starlit nights!
I signed up for Box of Rox kinda on a whim as a prep race for a 50k in New Mexico in 3 weeks. I looked at it as that and the opportunity to do a marathon length race. Nobody had a course profile other than word of mouth. Comparatively speaking I'd heard it was easier than Possum Kingdom where I'd completed a 55k last month. I thought ok- I got this deal done!
Saturday am upon arriving it was like 55 and just perfect for running long. I had a fear of going out too fast so I find the back of the pack and when the race starts I just stayed near the back but kept the main group in sight. The .1st aid station was 2 miles away and just a dirt road to it and I got there in like 17min. That's faster than what I wanted but it was cool so I passed it and worked on getting to mile 5 to get water. Well great plan but mile 2 to 5 is like being dropped on Mars or the Moon. I found out fast why the name Box of Rox! It was a huge open dome with nothing but boulders to scamper(crawl) up and down on. Well this continued off and on til mile 11. It was a beating but by skipping 2 aid stations I got in at the 1/2 way mark in 3:10. I was just thrilled! I thought I'd be done in 6:30 easy!
Loop 2- I headed out and when I hit the dome it was getting hot. Quickly I realized that skipping water stops was a huge mistake. Mile 18 aid station and I just wasn't feeling it but one of the volunteers had a little "come to Jesus" meeting with me and got me back going. Just as I was leaving a friend- Ritu came in and seeing a familiar face gave me strength to get to 21. Mile 21 I was just toast and considered dropping but they were playing the same song over n over and I knew I couldn't stay there. The next aid was 24.5 and that was tough. I tried gu's and more salt tabs but I couldn't keep anything down and soon it was just dry heaves and I was soon out of water. I think about a mile from my next water stop a bike rider showed up from nowhere and gave me water and he stayed near me til I got to the station. It was almost surreal. He told me his name but I was out if it and pretty much delirious. I tried having a seat and was having bladder issues by now. I was just done and didn't care. The volunteer there asked if he could pour some water on me to cool my core. Well I wasn't in much shape to argue and after he dumped 2 Gott's of water on me I felt like a new man!! Crap I shoulda done that 7 miles before! I had 40min with 1.7 miles to go and the volunteer told me to walk. I walked awhile then sprint then walk. Back and forth til I saw the finish then I rolled as fast as I could. My time was terrible and I took a beating but hey- couch to a marathon in 3 1/2 months- I'm ok with it.
Lessons learned- hydrate early and often. To save weight I started without water and only used my handheld the entire race. I had my hydration vest to carry salt tabs, etc. Costly mistake!! By the time I saw I was in trouble it was too late to quickly recover. Next mistake- ignore the pack and run like I train. I watch my splits and slow down when I need to. Overall it was a great experience and 24hrs later it's going to be a must do for me. Next year will be smoother! Now it's rest, recuperate and work on my core before going to the mountains over Memorial weekend to take a beating but complete another milestone! I have so many friends to support and guide me and they are what keeps me lacing up my shoes! Thanks guys and girls!
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